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Archive for the Category »Stories «

A Night for Shellfish

I’ve been looking through my old posts and just realized a humourous story that I think I wrote elsewhere but never posted here. This is a true story as related to me by a friend I’ve worked with during one of the plays by The Oral Stage crew (check out their site at http://www.theoralstage.com/ , they haven’t been active so far this year, though).

Prakash was in charge of booking a venue for his college’s prom night so he called up one of the hotels to inquire the rental and whatever deal they could provide.

Prakash: “Hello. I’m calling to book your hall for an event. Can you help me out?”

Receptionist: “Yes. May I ask what’s the event?”

Prakash: “It’s for my college. We’re having a prom night.”

Receptionist: “I see. If you can tell me the date, I will check to see if it’s available.”

Prakash: “Ok.”

Receptionist: “By the way, will you be bringing your own prawns?”

Prakash: “I’m sorry?”

Receptionist: “For your prawn night. Will you be bringing your own prawns or do you need us to supply them for you?”

Prakash: “It’s a PROM night. Not a prawn night! It’s a PROM night!”

Needless to say, both callers were embarrassed by the mistake. I wonder what made the receptionist think someone would actually organize a PRAWN night. Are there anyone who’s crazy in love with prawns to pay tribute to these shellfish? Hmmm, I never did find out whether Prakash actually rented that same hall. LOL

Toilet Humour Part 2

Back in 12th December 2008, I shared my first story, titled Toilet Humour, of being locked in a toilet. Well, it doesn’t end there. Here’s another ‘toilet humour’ to share with you.

One night, my step-mother’s nephew decided to sleep over at her house. They let him sleep in the guest bedroom, which was on the ground floor, away from the living room and the stairs that lead to the upstairs bedrooms. He had unpacked his bag and was about to go to bed when he needed to answer the ‘call of nature’.

Now, here’s something you need to know about the guest bathroom. The bathroom has two doors; one adjoint with the bedroom and the other to the music room, which is right beside the guest room. Both doors have lock-knobs that enable a person to lock the toilet door from outside and inside the bathroom. Do not ask me who is the genius behind this crazy doorlock system.

So, this nephew apparently went into the bathroom from the music room (I have no idea why) and was ignorant of the fact that the other toilet door was locked from inside his bedroom, so he couldn’t get out that way. He had to get out the same way he got in. Unfortunately…..my step-mother went through her nightly ritual of checking the locks on doors and windows, and unknowingly pulled the lock-knob of the music room’s toilet door, therefore imprisoning her nephew in the toilet.

By the time the nephew realized he was locked in the bathroom, everyone else had gone upstairs. He knocked, he yelled, he knocked some more, but still no help arrived. He couldn’t even call the house or his aunt because he had left his handphone on his bed in the bedroom, and what more, the windows were high up the wall and barred.

In the end, he resigned himself to sleeping in the bathtub, all the way from before midnight to just before dawn when the maid awoke and rescued him as she was going about her morning cleaning duties. You can be sure that he’ll have a phobia with his aunt’s toilet after this event. LOL

Weird Phone Calls

I’m sure you’ve been through this before; someone calls you and you tell them it’s the wrong number and yet they call again and again, or some stranger starts to ask you even stranger questions. Well, I’ve had my fair share of weird phone calls and here’s one of my weirdest calls.

A few years back, an unknown number called me in the afternoon. I answered it, thinking perhaps it’s one of my friends using a new number, or something. A male voice replied my ‘hello’ and started asking some odd questions.

“Hello,” he said, “Is this the number to call about the shop rental?”

“I’m sorry?” I answered. “I think you have the wrong number.”

“But this is the number written for the rental.”

“I’m not renting anything. I think you have the wrong number,” I repeated.

“Well, what’s the number then?”

My face started to frown. “I don’t know but this isn’t the number you’re looking for.”

“If you don’t know and I don’t know, then how?” he said, sounding a little annoyed.

I looked at the phone quizzically, still frowning, and finally just jabbed the ‘end’ button. He didn’t call again, thank God.

Look, it’s pretty simple. If you’re calling for something and the person on the other end is telling you they have no idea what you’re talking about, then PUT DOWN THE PHONE!! Or check the number that you dialled again. The whole world doesn’t revolve around you, you know. Razz

Toilet Humour

Have you heard of stories or have a personal experience of being locked in a toilet? Well, just to cheer myself up (and all of you out there), I thought I’d share some ‘toilet humour’.

One day when the cousins had an outing at Midvalley Megamall, the eldest girl needed to go to the loo. Since it was a public holiday, the rest of us knew that there was going to be a very long queue so we told her we would wait for her at the nearby shops. After nearly 10 minutes have passed, we all went to see what was the hold-up. Surely the queue couldn’t be that bad.

As we stood outside the entrance, one of us went to check the line but when we couldn’t find her anywhere, we thought she must still be in the loo or has gone out to find us. Just as I was about to dial her number, her name popped up on my caller screen.

“Where are you? Still in the toilet?” I asked.

“You have to come help me. I’m stuck,” my eldest cousin replied, slightly panicked.

“Stuck? What do you mean stuck? Stuck where?”

“I’m stuck in the toilet.”

“How can you be stuck there?”

“I can’t get the door to open. I’ve been trying and trying. Pushing, pulling, it won’t open,” her voice rising slightly through the speaker.

Laughing, I told the girls what was happening and all four of us went helter-skelter into the washroom. We called her name to find which stall she was in and she stuck her foot out from under the very first stall. The women queuing for the toilet just watched the impromptu entertainment show as we tugged and pushed the door. It was true, it wouldn’t open. We asked her to try the lock again but she said she had turned it all the way and it still wouldn’t open.

Just as we thought we needed to get hold of the maintanence people, I saw that the outside lock had a groove that would just fit a Malaysian 10 cent coin. Vaguely remembering a scene from somewhere, I dug out a coin from my jean pocket and fitted it into the lock and turned.

Lo and behold, the toilet door opened.

When she saw us, she fiercely hugged the closest cousin to her and instead of coming out, she dragged the cousin into the stall to prove that the lock was indeed faulty. Apparently, even though the latch was turned all the way, after years of wear and tear, a small piece of it managed to get stuck in the lock, creating (cue eerie music) ‘the toilet stall that can never be opened from the inside’.

And so we left, laughing and teasing her as we went on with our shopping, and later in the day, we returned to the same washroom as another cousin needed to answer the call of nature. There, we discovered that yet another poor soul has gotten herself stuck in the toilet and her friend had to call the cleaning lady, who was there at the time, to open the door. She used the exact same coin trick I had earlier. The thing is instead of locking the stall to prevent further use (and further imprisonment), the cleaning lady just left it as it is. I pity the woman who would be the foul demonic stall’s next victim. I’ll pity her even more if she was all alone and it was near the mall’s closing time with no one around to notice her predicament. Grin